Message by Rev. Erny McDonough
Fisherman’s Chapel, Port O’Connor, Texas
I Cor. 13:5 & 6 “[Love] … is not easily angered. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with truth.”
Intro: Today, I believe is the last of this series on Anger Management. It has been a long journey that has taken us from the first of the year until now. I am indebted to Dr. Les Carter, Dr. Frank Minereth, and Dr. Vaughn, whose writings inspired me to this task. I also received information from the Internet and other materials that I have in my study. I must also express appreciation to all of you, who have been great listeners and I believe doers of the Word as well. There have been many in this community, who have heard that I was ministering concerning Anger Management, who have encouraged me to continue this series. I trust now that we will be posting it on our web site for others to have an opportunity to be blessed as well. This is not a topic that I would have readily moved toward, but I felt the Lord’s breathe before Thanksgiving, 2007, that gave me the wind to work on such a topic.
You remember that the first week, (1) we noted some of the physical and psychological problems that have been the result of inappropriate anger. In week two, (2) we examined the fight-or-flight responses and saw both were damaging to God’s special creation. The third week, (3) we saw that God got angry in the Old Testament, and we used four (4) examples to show how His responses were always from a heart of love. The forth week, (4) we moved to the New Testament, noting three (3) examples of Jesus’ response to His anger and one example of the Holy Spirit responded to His pain. In week five, (5) we mentioned three (3) areas where we as Christians need to get angry and how we should respond to the injustices in our world. The sixth week, (6) we looked at seven (7) management tips to help us get our anger under proper control. In week seven, (7) we noted that a good subtitle could have been Taming Our Temper, and we listed seven (7) management tips to help get our anger under proper control. Last week, (8) we examined four (4) appropriate ways to respond to our anger, and today we will examine the other four (4).
Remember that Henry Drummond wrote in his book, “he Greatest Thing In The World,” No form of vice, nor worldliness, not greed of gold, not drunkenness itself, does more to uncharistianize society than evil tempers. For embittering life, for breaking up communities, for destroying the most sacred relationships, for devastating homes, for withering up men and women, for taking the bloom of childhood, for sheer gratuitous misery-producing power, this influence stands alone!”
Remembering The First Four (4) Appropriate Ways To Respond To Anger:
I. Anger Is One Emotion God Gave Us And Is Not In Itself Sin!
II. Admit All Angry, Expressions, Good Or Bad, Result From Choices!
III. Decide What Is Important To Be Angry About, And What Should Not Matter!
IV. Live In Humility And Listen To Others!
V. Ask Forgiveness From Those Offended By Your Angry Out-bursts!
We must choose to relinquish our craving for control. I know that is part of God’s image, but it is one part that we have to give back to our Creator! Often we use anger to get our way – which never solves any problems. We must understand that we truly have an excessive dependence for approval from the one who we exploded on – Let It Go! When we ask forgiveness, that becomes the deterrent to future angry outbursts. I John 1:9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
VI. Forgive Those We Feel Caused Our Anger!
Ephesians 4:31&32 “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ, God forgave you“.
Did you notice that the words bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, slander, and malice all give you a bad feeling by just mentioning them! Now notice how you feel as you say kind, compassionate, and forgiving. See how much better you feel with these thoughts running through your mind! When we concentrate on the later rather than the former list, we will find much more joy in our lives!
VII. Learn Why You Are Angry!
Alcohol and other drugs affect inhibitions in the brain, which often causes angry out-bursts, violence, and often even murder. Drinking is the number one predicator of physical and sexual abuse! By keeping our life-style habits consistent with our desired emotional control will help us live as we wished instead of living with regrets! Teach others to control their emotions by watching your life-style, i.e. be an example!
Grief can also produce anger – in fact, it is a necessary stage in the grieving process. Grief is not only produced when we have a death in our families, but any loss – from losing our youth to losing a job – can produce grief, which must be treated just as we would grief from death. We can control this anger like all others!
VIII. Ground Yourself In Truth!
Be careful that you do not watch too many movies to see if you can act like John Wayne or Bruce Willis. Jesus taught Thy Word is truth. Cultivate the Fruit of the Spirit as found in Galatians 5:22&23. When we are filled with love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faithfulness, meekness, and self-control, there will be little room for inappropriate use of anger.
Conclusion: Remember, we are accountable for our actions! We must be accountable with our anger! It is okay for a Child of the King to ask for help dealing with their anger! The Lord will send us help to keep us from sinning! When we decide to no longer be ruled by our anger, we will be filled with peace and laughter.